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What Is Your Body Language Saying
Every Move You Make, every last gesture whether it’s a tilt of the head
or plain fidgeting tells a story. Do you look down when you speak? Play
with your hair? Lean to one side? Learn what you’re telling others with
your body language and what others are telling you with theirs
How to Read Faces
Brushing Hair Off Your Face
This movement, a combination of nerves and flirtation, helps call attention to and frame your feminine assets (think face and neck). No wonder it’s a staple of a promising date.
Smiling
Botox be damned! The only real smile, says Anita Barbee, a professor of social work at the University of Louisville, in Kentucky, is one in which eye muscles are engaged. People who grin for more than five seconds and only with their lips can be faking it. Frequent smiling in the workplace can make a person seem less serious.
Blinking
The normal blink rate is six to eight times a minute. But under stress, you’ll blink more often and somewhat more dramatically. Want to know who’s freaking out and who’s as cool as a cucumber at the next big meeting? The eyes have it.
Nibbling Your Lips
If you bite, suck on, or lick your lips when under pressure or in an awkward situation, you’re attempting to comfort or soothe yourself, says psychologist Carol Kinsey Goman, the author of The Nonverbal Advantage ($20, amazon.com).
Scratching Your Nose
Don’t get caught in a lie. “When a person fibs, it’s often accompanied by an adrenaline rush,” says psychologist Michael Cunningham, a professor of communication at the University of Louisville. This release causes capillaries to expand, making the nose itch. Another tall-tale tell: a sustained glance. A liar often overcompensates for being perceived as shifty by focusing a bit too intently on the person he is fibbing to.
Sending Darting Glances
This catch-your-eye game, usually played in guy-girl situations, tends to mirror your scattered thoughts. Does he like me? Do I like him? Do I want him to come over here? Also, unlike a direct gaze, the back-and-forth variety is a protective measure: If he doesn’t approach you, you won’t feel rejected.
Nodding Your Head
If you nod in clusters of three, the speaker will sense your interest, and this can lengthen her response threefold, says Goman. Word to the wise: Nod only once when trying to escape Chatty Cathy.
How to Read Faces
Closing Your Eyes
By rubbing, covering, or closing your eyes for longer than a blink, you’re trying to keep out certain auditory or visual cues. It’s a survival mechanism to prevent the brain from processing anything undesirable or threatening.
Lowering Your Gaze
This meek gesture is an unconscious bid for public support a favorite tactic of small children, not to mention the late Princess Diana. It often elicits a parental response. If someone does it to you, she may be searching for your empathy. Be gentle.
Pursing Your Lips
Narrowing the red margins of your lips is a clear sign of anger, says Paul Ekman, professor emeritus at the University of California, San Francisco. Why? When a person is not truly mad, she typically can’t feign this gesture, even if she tries.
How to Read Faces
Brushing Hair Off Your Face
This movement, a combination of nerves and flirtation, helps call attention to and frame your feminine assets (think face and neck). No wonder it’s a staple of a promising date.
Smiling
Botox be damned! The only real smile, says Anita Barbee, a professor of social work at the University of Louisville, in Kentucky, is one in which eye muscles are engaged. People who grin for more than five seconds and only with their lips can be faking it. Frequent smiling in the workplace can make a person seem less serious.
Blinking
The normal blink rate is six to eight times a minute. But under stress, you’ll blink more often and somewhat more dramatically. Want to know who’s freaking out and who’s as cool as a cucumber at the next big meeting? The eyes have it.
Nibbling Your Lips
If you bite, suck on, or lick your lips when under pressure or in an awkward situation, you’re attempting to comfort or soothe yourself, says psychologist Carol Kinsey Goman, the author of The Nonverbal Advantage ($20, amazon.com).
Scratching Your Nose
Don’t get caught in a lie. “When a person fibs, it’s often accompanied by an adrenaline rush,” says psychologist Michael Cunningham, a professor of communication at the University of Louisville. This release causes capillaries to expand, making the nose itch. Another tall-tale tell: a sustained glance. A liar often overcompensates for being perceived as shifty by focusing a bit too intently on the person he is fibbing to.
Sending Darting Glances
This catch-your-eye game, usually played in guy-girl situations, tends to mirror your scattered thoughts. Does he like me? Do I like him? Do I want him to come over here? Also, unlike a direct gaze, the back-and-forth variety is a protective measure: If he doesn’t approach you, you won’t feel rejected.
Nodding Your Head
If you nod in clusters of three, the speaker will sense your interest, and this can lengthen her response threefold, says Goman. Word to the wise: Nod only once when trying to escape Chatty Cathy.
How to Read Faces
Closing Your Eyes
By rubbing, covering, or closing your eyes for longer than a blink, you’re trying to keep out certain auditory or visual cues. It’s a survival mechanism to prevent the brain from processing anything undesirable or threatening.
Lowering Your Gaze
This meek gesture is an unconscious bid for public support a favorite tactic of small children, not to mention the late Princess Diana. It often elicits a parental response. If someone does it to you, she may be searching for your empathy. Be gentle.
Pursing Your Lips
Narrowing the red margins of your lips is a clear sign of anger, says Paul Ekman, professor emeritus at the University of California, San Francisco. Why? When a person is not truly mad, she typically can’t feign this gesture, even if she tries.
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